the only way down

by Patresa Hartman

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1.
I made a mask with all the strongest threads I could find Sewed it up with trembling hands in my spare time My whole youth went by before I ever saw a sign Of a life so in disguise you'd never know it was mine On the 3rd day of the last month of the year I wore that mask amid uncertainty and fear Soon a gathered crowd began to sneer Who you trying to be, Girl? There's no room for your kind here There's an impostor here Snuck in with the dark through an open vein Laid bare the lies I told Did it all with a borrowed name There's an impostor here Ran out in the rain with a rattling chain Laid bare what I denied Now it's me, a song, and a borrowed name If who you are is not the same as who you been And what you do is not the same as what you done If the truth is like a bullet from a gun You can hide but that's a story you'll never outrun There's an impostor here Snuck in with the dark through an open vein Laid bare the lies I told Did it all with a borrowed name There's an impostor here Ran out in the rain with a rattling chain Laid bare what I denied Now it's me, a song, and a borrowed name
2.
Amelia 04:35
I wanna be Amelia Flying over the ocean So high on an idea The only way down is a nose dive I wanna be Amelia Lose myself in a mission Tangle up in the weeds of My soul's great ambition Try as they did to ground her She risked it all for a flight dream Shattered glass of cloud ceiling I wanna be more like Amelia I wanna be St. Cecelia Sing my heart up to God So in love with devotion Not even death could deter I wanna be St. Cecelia In league with the angels No sword was sharp enough To silence her song Try as they did to break her She resolved to sustain Joy and praise bubbled over I wanna be more like St. Cecelia I wanna be Anaïs Nin So alive in her passion Flawed but feverish To create a life she lost I wanna be Anaïs Nin Alight on an ink pen Set fire to a tinder box Just to feel some heat Try as they did to tame her She ran wild with desire Rules were hers for the breaking I wanna be more like Anaïs Nin. Oh, Amelia Come to me, St. Cecelia
3.
Enemy 03:39
There's a turf war in my bed One side my heart and the other my head Guns blaze when the sun has set And when it rise I'm left for dead Two captains in one ship The floor leans left and the sail is ripped Two heads could be better than one But they're hell bent axe swinging until there are none Running for cover Lord don't take me under Deaf ear to my own plea I am my own worst enemy Signed a truce on the back of my hand To mend this divided land Built a bridge, then I burned it down Sailed mercy's ship and let it run aground Running for cover Lord don't take me under Deaf ear to my own plea I am my own worst enemy What won't bend will break No matter what's at stake It's time to drop all arms Drop guard, drop step instead of dropping bombs. Running for cover Lord don't take me under Deaf ear to my own plea I am my own worst enemy Where are you peacemaker? Where are you, my savior? I am my own peacemaker Can I be my own savior?
4.
Rotary Dial 04:25
I'm gonna trade my cell for a rotary dial Curly cord 10 feet from the kitchen wall I may go weeks without talking at all I'm gonna trade my cell for a rotary dial I'm gonna trade email for a note on the door Love, So-and-So, I'll stop back after 4 I may go weeks without writing at all I'm gonna trade email for a note on the door I'm gonna trade TV for a hill with a view I'll take a nap in the grass if I choose I may go weeks without writing hearing the news I'm gonna trade TV for a hill with a view I'm gonna trade this world for the one in my soul World says I need more but I'm already full I may go weeks without leaving at all I'm gonna trade this world for the one in my soul
5.
Patient 05:27
Twisted hollowed log alone in the middle of a wood Surrounded by the ash of a fire that burned too long It's been waiting for the rain to bring the green again Well, I've been waiting on time But time wasn't waiting for me Come heal me I'll be patient if you'll be kind Come heal me I'll be Patience's if you'll be kind Find this hollowed heart and fill me Come heal me I'll be patient There's a clearing in the wood where light can reach the ground And everything there feels right and warm like home I'd love to find that again But it always seems somewhere behind 'Cause I've been racing time While time was waiting for me Come heal me I'll be patient if you'll be kind Come heal me I'll be Patience's if you'll be kind Find this hollowed heart and fill me Come heal me I'll be patient All in good time All in good time Turn off my mind And give it all to time Turn off my pride And give it all to time Underneath it all a spring runs cool and pure It washes all the roots until they come clean again I'll dig down deep enough to drink from that spring No need to fight with time 'Cause time's a friend to me Come heal me I'll be patient if you'll be kind Come heal me I'll be Patience's if you'll be kind Find this hollowed heart and fill me Come heal me I'll be patient
6.
Ember 02:30
Here comes the dark I'll bring the light It's more than just a flash Oh, will you trust me? Here comes the fear I'll bring the brave It's more than just a childlike tendency to jump I am a warrior I am a child soldier Dust from a star I am an ember And I am here to burn You underestimate my voice It may be small But it comes straight from Heaven's window I see the torture that you feel With each choice and consequence But I always fall in grace I am a warrior I am a child soldier Dust from a star I am an ember And I am here to burn
7.
Bygones 03:58
By God those bygones uprooted and hightailed home Yanked seeds out of ground And away they flew I see you You're half way to the moon now I see you You're half way round the sun Good for you How's it feel to be out from under and way over it? How's it feel to be brand new To weigh nothing at all I see you You're half way to the moon now I see you You're half way round the sun Good for you All the waters spill for you just like I knew they would All the megawatts burn for you just like I knew they would All the world lit a fire for you just like I said it would You let go of everything just like I knew you could By God those bygones uprooted and hightailed home
8.
Ambrose 02:42
Not a saint Just a man No honey tongue Just land Not a saint Just a man No honey tongue Just land But it's green and lush in spring Come winter it's a different thing I know its pulse like she raced mine I wanted her But those were hard times I loved once and then again Grief close as an Irish twin Loved once and then again Grief close as an Irish twin Made a home out of solitude Grew lean from fortitude Not as holy as my family Maybe God had a bone to pick with me This is neither here nor there History is just spent air This is neither here nor there History is just spent air You'd be crazy to marry me, I suppose You'd be crazy to marry me, I suppose You'd be crazy to marry me, I suppose My name is Ambrose.
9.
Messenger 04:33
Try as we may to change the seasons They come and go with their own reasons Autumn goes Winter goes And we go Chasing ghosts down alleys Cheating fate until it rallies Day falls Night falls And we fall In deep Power me up We'll be thick like the thieves Watch time break like splintered trees If the world won't still At least we're still In deep Will you be my messenger Will you be my God's eye view Will you be my messenger Divine intervention too Will you be my messenger Will you be my God's eye view Will you be my messenger I'll be your ingénue. 100 ways to get to core To distract there are 10,000 more We're spread so thin And then I hear you call for kindred soul Find the one that makes you whole But you are I am We already are In deep Will you be my messenger Will you be my God's eye view Will you be my messenger Divine intervention too Will you be my messenger Will you be my God's eye view Will you be my messenger I'll be your ingénue.

about

All Words & Music by Patresa Hartman

Tracks 1, 2, 5, & 9
Recorded at My Humble Abode Studio in Cedar Falls, IA
Recorded & Mixed by Jon Chamberlain
Produced by Jon Chamberlain & Patresa Hartman

Tracks 3, 4, 6, 7, & 8
Recorded at Sound Farm in Jamaica, IA
Recorded & Mixed by Ryan Martin
Produced by Ryan Martin & Patresa Hartman

All tracks mastered by Jon Chamberlain

credits

released August 16, 2014

Patresa Hartman: All vocals, acoustic guitar, piano
Jenny Kohls: Electric Guitar (Enemy)
Chris Hedman: Electric Guitar (Borrowed Name, Ember, Bygones)
Andy Adams: Drums (Ember, Bygones)
Kat Darling: Djembe & Background vocals (Enemy, Rotary Dial)
Aaron Earl Short: Harmonica (Rotary Dial)

Jon Chamberlain: Recording & Mixing Engineer
Ryan Martin: Recording & Mixing Engineer
Jon Chamberlain: Mastering Engineer

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Patresa Hartman Des Moines, Iowa

Singer-Songwriter, Patresa Hartman, calls her style "soul-folk" -- characterized by a rich, blues voice; poetic, confessional lyrics; percussive guitar plucking; and jazz and gospel-tinged keys.

Hartman has released 2 full-length albums with a 3rd on the way.
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